Confessional Relationship Blessed with Ash and Oil
I am lingering in Ash Wednesday this week. The thing is, I don't normally linger over Ash Wednesday. The majority of my past experiences chafe my theology, ranging anywhere from a meaningless, rushed imposition of ashes to liturgy over-indulgent in the heaviness of our sinfulness and mortality. What is the purpose of such emphasis on our sinfulness within the hearts of people struggling with pain, depression, self-worth, and injustice? What is the purpose of understanding ashes as shared nothingness for our elders already burdened with navigating their own end of life season, while also feeling a deep responsibility and sense of failure for the decline of their local congregation, amidst the larger trend of church decline and closings?What is the purpose of living in such an unending grief, when we are created in God’s image, with bodies that are a temple for the indwelling Holy Spirit?It is not that I have a discomfort with sin and mortality, these are natural parts of our shared human experience and faith. What provokes me is liturgy that leads us to remain in spaces of grief over our sinfulness and mortality, without a real path towards healing.This year was different. Ash Wednesday was the beginning of my facilitating a Lenten relational discernment journey with the congregation of Park Hill United Church of Christ (PHUCC). PHUCC pastor Rev. David Bahr and I co-created and co-led the Ash Wednesday service along with music director Billie Busby Smith, and their musical ensemble. While Lent can be a path towards healing, it takes more than frivolous sacrifices like giving up a favorite food. More importantly, it means stretching ourselves to take on meaningful spiritual practices towards deepening our faith and relationship to God. This is the purpose of our Lenten relational discernment journey. So let us begin with new rituals for Ash Wednesday.
One-to-One Relational Confession & Offering Assurance of God’s Grace
Remaining in grief is antagonistic to the Gospel, in which Jesus is forming disciples within his life, death, and resurrection. Saying to Mary Magdalene as she stood weeping outside of Jesus’ tomb, “Woman, why are you weeping? Who are you looking for?” (John 20:15) And later that same day, Jesus came and stood amongst the disciples and said to them again, “Peace be with you. As the Creator has sent me, so I send you.” When Jesus had said this, he breathed on the disciples and said to them, “Receive the Holy Spirit. If you forgive the sins of any, they are forgiven their sins; if you retain the sins of any, they are retained.” (John 20:21-22)Modeled after Jesus’ words and acts, we offered God’s grace to one another within relationships of discipleship. We invited the congregation to find one other person, and encouraged them to find someone they didn’t know very well. A stranger to whom they would confess, and in return, this stranger would offer them God’s grace.This was new and uncharted territory for this congregational UCC faith community, as it would be for many congregations. As I began to describe this new confessional ritual, I looked around the circle. Reflected back to me were familiar faces, most of which had that look you make when you suddenly realize you’ve made a huge mistake. But they didn’t shut down, or leave the sanctuary, they held themselves open enough to keep listening. Open enough to try something new. This is one of the gifts Park Hill UCC—their willingness to engage new opportunities.I assured them that while this may make them think of a Catholic confessional booth, this would be different. We are all called to minister with and to one another, and in this space, there was no hierarchy of ordained or lay, no penance, just the relationship of Christian discipleship and God’s abiding grace.The congregation paired off, and each pair moved throughout the sanctuary to find a space to sit with their partner. I Invited them simply to be present to one another and to be brave in sharing that which would release them. Reminding them that presence was not just intellectual—the default for many of us. Presence means engaging the Spirit with our fullness, including our bodies. Our presence to one another might include asking for consent to physical connection and touch like holding someone’s hands as they confess, or offering them a hug as an embodiment of the assurance of God’s grace.Over the next seven minutes, the room came alive as people sat one-to-one in the presence of God witnessed through the connection to each other, opened their hearts to share their burdens, leaned in to listen deeply with holy care, cried with rushes of grief and release, hugged and held one another, and found freedom and joy in offering and receiving this assurance of God’s Grace:
Thank you for entrusting me with the burdens of your heart. I offer you God’s grace and forgiveness.And remind you of the words Jesus told many who sought his healing, “Your faith has made you well, go in peace, and be healed.”
Healing Amidst the Ashes
The confessional pairs returned back to the congregational worship circle, and I invited the congregation to share what their one-to-one experience was like. Especially with a new ritual, taking the time to pause and reflect together emboldens our individual and collective memories of the actual experience and impact of the ritual, and further distances the initial fear and anxiety. This is some of what was shared:
I felt relief. I came here tonight with a heavily burdened heart. And now I feel better, lighter.It felt good, because I was able to be openhearted. I felt that I could say anything. [from a child]I was really surprised to learn that someone else is struggling with essentially thesame things that I am struggling with. It was powerful to not be alone.Normally, I find it difficult to share from the heart with other people, especially people I know well. I was amazed at how I was able to share with a stranger, and how good that felt.
After this group sharing, everyone was invited to take the piece of paper they had received earlier in the service, bring them forward, and place them into a tray to be burned. On each paper were written private confessions offered to God, taken together in fire as a ritual release of the chains that bind and weigh us down. An opportunity to free ourselves from our sins—that which separates us from God and one another.An Ash Wednesday service that offers ritual and physical peace and healing, is prophetic when our shared experience is overweighted with fear, pain, suffering, and unnecessary death. Christ invites us to journey through the ash together—not retain our sin or remain in our grief. This process of moving through the ash requires our small faith to grow larger, demands that we know and accept ourselves as sacred, and expects us to use our gifts and talents to be healers within our relationships to one another, and especially with the stranger.
Prophetic Blessing of Ash and Oil
In the spirit of healing we offered ashes and anointing oil to the congregation, to symbolize the holiness of our life and death, our humanity and sacredness, our grief and our healing—the fullness of our relationship to God and one another in discipleship. Congregants received ashes from Rev. Dr. David Bahr followed by anointing with Juniper Formation’s Prophetic Renewal anointing oil, which was co-created with Rev. Nancy Niero of Anoint ministry, for the purpose of healing and revitalization. To each person I offered the blessing, “May your spirit be renewed, and may your relationship to God deepen and be healed this Lenten season. Amen.”The prophetic blessing of using both ash and oil reminds me of the poignant lyrics from a new song titled, “Divine Dust,” written by Jenny LaJoye. This song is from the new sacred music album “Speak Boldly,” which Juniper Formation commissioned as part of our mission to accompany and support the formation of new, prophetic ministries. Whether they are existing worshiping congregations like Park Hill UCC or brand new like the sacred music ministry of Jenny LaJoye, the best part is when we can accompany one another in getting caught up in the movement of the Holy Spirit.
God walked with us that we might walk with God.Divine assumed the dust that we might be Divine.
Resources for Your Faith Journey
Prayer
During the Ash Wednesday service we read this relational confession prayer together:Gracious God, we confess that too often our faith falters. It seems that more and more we choose to live in fear, instead of in the glory and power of your Love. We have allowed ourselves to become insignificant, instead of faithfully fulfilling our Call. We confess that we are uncertain, unaware, and even fearful of our God-given gifts and talents. And even when we embrace them, we still question, “Why me? Who am I to be so bold, wonderfully made, and Called to such sacred significance in this time, in this context, and within these relationships?” We confess that we have fallen out of faith-filled relationships with you and one another. And it isn’t just that we’ve been distant and isolated, we confess that we have also been quick to anger and judge, hurtful with our words and actions, self-protective, and unwilling to listen and to seek God in one another. We have fallen in love with money and things, instead of people, creation, and You, God. We neglect human need and suffering and are indifferent to injustice, because it requires us to be transformed. The truth is, we are not really sure about following the Way of Christ. We believe it is the right thing to do, but actually following Christ, well that would turn our whole world upside down. And yet, inside of each one of us Your still speaking voice pulls at our heart with a divine wisdom that invites us into the liberation of loving relationship with You. We confess that sometimes what binds us can trick us into feeling safe and comfortable in the midst of our suffering. Divine liberation is so foreign to us that we fear it is unsafe and unwieldy. Create in us hearts on fire with the Holy Spirit; heal our pain, fear, and anger; and sustain our courage as we vulnerably reach out for You and learn to live the Way of Christ together. Amen.
Scripture
This is a portion of the usual Ash Wednesday scripture Isaiah 58:1-12, that I re-wrote to contemporize. PHUCC pastor Rev. Dr. David Bahr and I read this to the congregation, offered as the voice of God:
What good is prayer when you keep spreading hate and violence?This kind of prayer will never get you anywhere with me.
You humble yourselves by going through the motions of forgiveness,Bowing your heads like grass blowing in the wind,Hoping no one will notice when you sin again.
You cover yourselves with ashes, content to live in your suffering and impotence.You act like you are insignificant as people of God.All the while, applauding yourselves saying, “Well at least I’m not like those people.”
Is this what you call being faithful to God? Being small in your faith?
Do you really think this is what I want for you?Do you think this is what I want for us? For our relationship?
What I want is for you to:
Free those who are wrongly and unfairly imprisoned and detained: immigrants; refugees; Black, Latinx, and Xhicano people; American Indians; activists; those with diverse sexualities and gender identities; those with mental, emotional, and physical differences; and the children. You must free the children from cages, from abuse, from sex trafficking, gun violence, and from suicide.
Lighten the burden of those you are responsible to and for: The child, parent, sibling, employee, neighbor, congregant, pastor, and the stranger.
Let the oppressed go free, and remove the chains that bind and bury.
Share your food with the hungry, your clean water with the thirsty.
Take care of my Creation. Don’t build that pipeline; frack the earth; and stop leeching and leaking oil, chemicals, and trash all over my beloved Creation.
Give shelter to the homeless, safety and power to the threatened and vulnerable.
Give, give, give so that none suffer.
Do not hide from relatives, neighbors, friends, and church members who need your help.They are your kin.
All of this, even and especially when it is too much to bear, because I will be with you.
Living out your faith will lead you forward,Then your salvation will come like the new dawn, and your wounds will quickly heal.The glory and grace of God will defend and protect you.
Then when you call for me, when you cry out for help, I will answer, “I am here.”
This post is part of a Lenten series, in which Juniper Formation founder and Minister of Prophetic Formation Rev. Dr. Jenny Whitcher is blogging alongside the facilitation of a relational discernment process with Park Hill United Church of Christ UCC. This series is offered with support and permission of Park Hill UCC, in our shared hope of providing 1) ongoing reflection and engagement with the congregation, and inclusion for those unable to physically be present for all parts of our journey; and 2) a unique opportunity for a wider audience to learn more in depth about the ministry and approach of Juniper Formation. You can read more about the purpose and process leading up to this Lenten series here. For all posts in this series visit Juniper Formation’s Inspirations blog, or subscribe to Juniper Formation’s blog posts and newsletter.
